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Re: don't let this happen to you! Get educated!
From: DJ Satori Nerd that I am, I was taking down figures to do some cross-checking on the statistics. ;) S On 11/3/05, Brian Ffar <brianffar@...> wrote: > > Yes, it was one of those days where I thought I could use some extra > cheer, > so I thought I would spread the joy :) > B > > On 11/2/05, Luis-Manuel Garcia <lgarcia@...> wrote: > > > > OK, so for some reason reading "The Squirt" made me spew my soda all > > over my laptop screen. You've foiled me for the last time, Ffar! > > > > Luis > > Chicago, ILL > > > > p.s. the "Various Artists 2" sampler from Katapult records makes me > > Squirt. > > > > On Nov 2, 2005, at 12:38 PM, Brian Ffar wrote: > > > > > DID YOU KNOW... > > > > > > 80 percent of panty waste to the environment comes from nasty-ass > > > basslines. > > > Runoff panty waste includes many small sources, like Areal Records, > > > Electo-puncture treatment, and specifically Buford T. Justice. > > > > > > Millions of club goers make daily, one-dump-at-a-time "oil spills" > > > onto > > > dancefloors and in their adult diapers, which add significantly to > > > runoff > > > panty waste. > > > > > > Some panty waste actually starts as a small drip, which settles into > > > clothing and outerwear. > > > > > > Panty waste, commonly called "The Squirt", can make clubs and DJ > > > Booths > > > unsafe. In some areas, runoff panty waste is so bad that it causes > > > clubs to > > > be closed due to flooding. In 1992, for example, some clubs were > > > closed or > > > advisories were issued against dancing about 3,000 times. > > > > > > Drinking water supplies can be contaminated by The Squirt. Experts > > > think > > > there is a link between a big bass kick and sound-bourn orgasms > > > that cause > > > this phenomenon to occur. Humans who come in contact with these > > > basslines > > > can also experience sweating, drowsyness, and diarrhea. > > > More than one-third of the clubgoers of the United States are > > > adversely > > > affected by bass-driven panty waste. > > > > > > Get educated and share your knowledge! > > > > > > Wear panty-protection at all times! > > > > > > Find approved DJ's in your city, and make sure your family and > > > friends use > > > them. > > > > > > Use earplugs as sparingly as possible. Before spreading legs, check > > > the pmpm > > > rating of your DJ so they don't wash you away. > > > > > > > > > Panty Melting Help Line: 1-888-MYLOINS > > > PMA Website: www.pantyiesonfire.com <http://www.pantyiesonfire.com>; < > http://www.pantyiesonfire.com>; < > > http://www.pantyiesonfire.com/>; > > > PMA Service > > > Office of Temperature Reduction > > > ATTN: Non-point Panty waste > > > 2352 W. Bloomingdale Ave. #3W > > > Chicago, IL 60647 > > > > > > > > > -- > > > Brian Ffar > > > [Gourmet | Beat Code | Listen To Reason] > > > > > > [Proton Radio | www.protonradio.com <http://www.protonradio.com>; < > http://www.protonradio.com>; < > > http://www.protonradio.com>;] > > > [Website | www.brianffar.com <http://www.brianffar.com>; < > http://www.brianffar.com>; < > > http://www.brianffar.com>;] > > > > > > Out Now: > > > "Room Theory" | "Chile Molester" [Gourmet] March 2005 > > > > > > Upcoming Releases: > > > Brian Ffar/Cant EP [Tic Tac Toe 7] [November 2005] > > > Alcatraz Swim Team - "This Little World" (Brian Ffar Rmx) [Beatcode] > > > "One Circle Up EP" [Listen to Reason] Mid 2005 > > > Alland Byallo - "My Nightlight" (Ffar's low battery rmx) > > > [Nightlight] May > > > 2005 > > > > > > > -- > Brian Ffar > [Gourmet | Beat Code | Listen To Reason] > > [Proton Radio | www.protonradio.com <http://www.protonradio.com>; < > http://www.protonradio.com>;] > [Website | www.brianffar.com <http://www.brianffar.com>; < > http://www.brianffar.com>;] > > Out Now: > "Room Theory" | "Chile Molester" [Gourmet] March 2005 > > Upcoming Releases: > Brian Ffar/Cant EP [Tic Tac Toe 7] [November 2005] > Alcatraz Swim Team - "This Little World" (Brian Ffar Rmx) [Beatcode] > "One Circle Up EP" [Listen to Reason] Mid 2005 > Alland Byallo - "My Nightlight" (Ffar's low battery rmx) [Nightlight] May > 2005 > Previous: camea - "Re: Logic 7 Or Qubase Sx 3?????" |